it was all only a dream.
i'v been hurt. badly.
my love was pure.
i saw u.
BUT U DON'T SEE ME.
i tried slapping myself outta reality ytd night.
i told u the thing i guess u wanted to hear SO BADLY - that is to let u go.
wasnt it?
spent the whole day in store thinkin bout it. i was so upset when u asked me to put a stop to all these.
i din meant it when i told u that, i knew i din meant it when i broke down in your arms.
it hurts.
-misery.
guess I'LL NEVER BE GOOD ENOUGH FOR U.
i'm not loving enough.
i'm not pretty enough.
i'm not good enough.
i'm not good enough.
for u.
and i never will.
i kept a journal of memories we had.
I'm feeling lonely,
I can't breathe.
I fall to pieces, I'm falling.
Fell to pieces and I'm still falling.
i'v never seen myself cried so hard before.
perhaps ytd was the first.
when i finally manged to tuck myself into bed at 3 in the morning, i cried again.
my nose and ears were ardy blocked. i was having this throbbing headache.
i'm so disappointed in myself.
but i'm glad i got somewhere for ventilation,
someone to hear me out,
my nonsense and stand by me*thanks nikk*
sorry u'v to put up with all my crying and nonsense the whole night.
thanks von.. thanks everyone.
self destruction.
i'v been hurt. i've been hurt so badly by YOU.
my heart's gona close up , i'm gona close my door on others. i'm not gona love anymore.
i'm so tired. y must u do this to me?
haven i been good enough? for u i'v changed.
my character my attitude and my habits.
just for u.
BUT U DON'T APPRECIATE ALL THIS.
guess u'l never realise how much i reali love u.
should i just disappear from ur life?
perhaps i shd just walk away.
I will love u in silence.
outta all this misery.
u'v made ur choice.
it wasnt ME and it wasnt HER.
i'v gotta be strong but i cant. i need u badly.
i need u to hold me tight.
would u tell me how precious i am?
u will never do that.
I'LL NEVER GET TO CALL U MY LOVE.
tell me why? school's starting tmr.i'm gona join floorball. i'm gona study hard.i'm gona take one bike lesson every week. the earliest dismissal tym is 5pm.the latest lesson starts at 12pm.i'm gona work on sat 3 to 9.30opm and sun 11 to 9.30pm in PS. i'm just so not good enough for u. n i dunno y.